Workshop Fatigue?

(A Happy Note: A couple days ago, I passed the magical milestone of $100 worth of ad clicks. Which means the good folks at Google AdSense will be sending me a check next month. So thanks to all of your who've been reading and clicking - Keep up the good work!)

A short time from now, I'm going to Jen and Molly's, for Sunday dinner (Jen & Molly are both actors I met through ACG; Jen is probably the most successful ACG regular, and Molly, after being the "power behind the throne" for a couple years, now runs ACG).

It's a regular "thing" (Them inviting friends over on Sunday nights), but I've only been able to participate the past couple months, since quitting my job at ArcLight Cinemas (Though I didn't go last week, cause I was dragging physically, and didn't feel up to it).

But speaking of ACG...

The September schedule of casting workshops has been out for awhile now, but I haven't signed up for any.

It's partly because the schedule's full of people I've already seen, and don't feel I need to see again.

But it's also because I'm frustrated that I'm not getting auditions/booking gigs, and I'd really like my "career" to be about something more than going to workshops.

Soon I'm going to start working at Weight Watchers (I've been "hired", and the paperwork's done - I'm just waiting to hear back when I start training), and one thing I've been considering, when I get a sense of my new schedule, is how doing theater might fit into that schedule.

Now, starting to do theater again wouldn't preclude continuing to do workshops.

Except...

Most of the theaters here in LA seem to have "memberships" - You audition, you become a "member", there's a minimum monthly "work requirement" ...and there are monthly dues.

And unless my financial fortunes take a serious upturn - which is certainly possible (A good network national would certainly do the trick!) - I can't afford to add another monthly bill into the mix.

So something would have to go. And that "something" would probably be workshops.

But there are reasons I don't want to give up workshops, and reasons I'm ambivalent about trying to do theater again, so I will almost certainly be writing about this stuff again, soon.

But for now, it's off to North Hollywood, for a little Sunday night dining...

(In my next entry, I'm going to write about why I'm not going to tell you "Why I've Always Wanted To Be An Actor". Stay tuned...)

Acting Political

Well, now it's pretty much certain - I didn' t book the Orbitz spot, either as "Masters Degree Guy" or "Tour Member".

Bummer. I could have used the infusion of cash.

But life goes on.

Speaking of "cash"....with $94.93 worth of ad clicks (As of moments ago), I'm a heartbeat away from a "Tales Of A Character Man" milestone - my first check (If/when you hit $100 in a given month, Google sends you a check early the following month).

This isn't just a "milestone" in terms of getting money, though that is nice - Other than acting, this is the first time I've actually tried to make money doing something I enjoy.

So thank you all for your support - and your clicks - and I hope you'll keep the love coming in the future.

By the way, I've had some people contact me with particular questions/concerns about the ads.

Unfortunately, my answer to any and all ad-related questions at this point is "I don't know". I actually can't click on the ads myself, lest I get kicked out of the Google AdSense program, so I haven't seen where the links link to, or anything like that; I'm basically just putting my faith in the fact that Google is a reputable concern, and wouldn't damage their own reputation, and ability to make money down the road, by taking ads from fly-by-night concerns.

All I really know is that when you come here and click on an ad, Google puts a couple pennies in my account. And that makes me happy.

But one way or the other, I will educate myself a little better on the AdSense program, so if you have questions/concerns, I can actually answer them (I think there's a program I can download to check if the links are working properly, so I may do that, just so I can click through ads, and see where I'm asking you to go).

And speaking of "educating myself", I finished Born Standing Up yesterday (It's a very quick read), and the next book up is The Eight Characters Of Comedy, a book on sitcom acting and writing by Scott Sedita.

I bought the book months ago at Samuel French, but have never gotten around to reading it (I don't know - Maybe I was waiting for sit-coms to make a comeback).

(After Tuesday's less-than-stellar commercial callback, maybe I need to dig out my books on commercial acting! But anyway...)

I looked at my SAG ballot earlier today, leaning towards the "Membership First" candidates, but not being very happy about it, when it occurred to me to just split my vote - amongst "Membership First", "Unite for Strength", and "Independent" candidates.

I'm not completely comfortable with "Membership First" - the faction running things right now - because I don't think they've handled the current AMPTP negotiations very well, and I think it was a mistake to wage a public campaign against AFTRA's deal with the AMPTP (It just wasn't very good p.r.).

But on the other hand, I think they're closest to where I'm at on the issues (The main "issue", for me, being residuals).

"Unite for Strength"'s main thing is a SAG/AFTRA merger, which they say will never happen under "Membership First" leadership.

And on the surface of things, a SAG/AFTRA merger couldn't make more sense - when actors are going up against the producers, who represent giant multinational corporations that have all the money and power in the world, they need to be united.

You'd think.

But AFTRA, far as I can see, has a history of concessions and appeasement of their corporate overlords, undercutting SAG with pretty much every contract they bargain. And how does SAG, in good faith, merge with that? What's the point of being "united", if the new union's "philosophy" will mean bending over and taking whatever unfair terms the producers offer?

The people who are now "Unite For Strength" have also tried, in the past, to push through a motion for "qualified voting", which basically means you have to work X amount of time, or on X number of jobs, under a specific contract - the commercials contract, for example - in order to vote on it.

I don't agree with that at all. The way I see it, if I'm in the union, and I'm paying dues, I get a vote. And just because I haven't worked in some aspect of the business yet , or I didn't in the past year, or whatever, that doesn't mean I won't in the future.

My main worry with "Unite for Strength" is that it's basically the party of the acting elite who don't need the union anyway (The performer's unions establish basic contracts, but if you're a big name, like Tom Hanks, say, you negotiate your own contract terms), so they'd be content to say yes to anything the producers offer, knowing it doesn't effect them anyway, just so they can keep working and getting their giant paydays.

(Hmmmm...I seem to have a stronger feeling about the "Unite for Strength" people than I realized...)

Crap - Maybe I'll just vote "Independent".

Steve Martin Titled His Autobiography "Born Standing Up". Mine Will Be More Like "Born Napping".

Well...

While it doesn't mean I didn't book the gig, yesterday's Orbitz callback did not feel good.

At all.

And that means I probably didn't book the gig.

I'll tell you something - I've been out here 7 1/2 years now, the bulk of my auditioning experience has been with commercials (followed by television, then, in a distant third, by movies), and in my opinion, commercial auditioning is, by far, the most difficult.

It's much easier to do scenes, like I do at casting workshops (Either reading with the casting person, or having an acting partner). In fact, it's so much easier that I'm going to make a bold statement here - If that's what I was doing every time I went in for an audition (Instead of commercial auditions and one-line co-star things), I would have broken through years ago.

Which means it's often frustrating, to be paying to do the thing I'm best at, while trying to make money doing the things I'm worst at.

At some point, I'm going to write about why that's the case.

But right now, since I don't want to dig myself into a pit of despair - which would be particularly silly in this situation, since I could still get a call from my agent by day's end saying I booked the job - I'm going to focus on why things could still work out, in spite of how I felt about yesterday's callback.

I have actually worked with Martin Granger, the director, before - I did a commercial for the Bahamas with him back in 2006 (A spot that was one of AdWeek's "Top 50 Commercials Of The Year") - so that could work in my favor; he knows I'm funny, and knows he can get what he needs from me, even if I stunk up the joint at the callback (Unfortunately, he's not the only "decider"; he could like me just fine, and still get shot down by the Orbitz people).

And I'm warming to something I was initially discouraged by when I went in yesterday - In the waiting area, the casting person handed me back my original headshot, which was now stapled to a Casting Frontier printout (Commercial casting is pretty much entirely digital at this point).

And on the bottom of the printout, there was a handwritten note - "Tour Member?".

In the spot, in addition to the guy playing the boss and the guy playing the envelope-licker-with-a-Masters-degree (The part I was up for), there are "tour members".

So, much like the Comcast promos I did last year, where I went in for the "hero" part of a tour guide and ended up being one of the tour members, I could get the "consolation prize" of "tour member" in this spot as well.

It really would be a "consolation prize" - I want to be the guy "bringing the funny", not just some schmuck in the background - but in this case, the "consolation prize" is cash, so I'll take it.

Speaking of cash, I got a small residual check in today's mail (For my co-star role on Monk that first aired back in January).

It's such a small check that it makes no difference in the grand scheme of things, or even in the medium-sized scheme of things. But it's still nice to have at least a little something come in from acting.

The other acting news right now is that ballots have been sent out for the upcoming SAG elections.

A faction has arisen - "Unite for Strength" - to challenge the current, "Membership First" majority.

I'm going to be voting Membership First, but the whole thing gives me a stomach-ache, since I feel like a vote for either side could end up being a terrible, terrible mistake, and there doesn't seem anywhere to get an unbiased view of the issues involved.

But that's material for another entry (Cause it really is an entry in and of itself).

I've started reading the Steve Martin autobiography, Born Standing Up.

He has a somewhat formal writing style that took me a few pages to get used to, but be that as it may, I heartily recommend this book to aspiring performers - Long story short, Steve Martin didn't become "Steve Martin" by accident, and it's instructive to see just how much dedication and effort go into making any kind of performance "effortless" (And if any young comedians are reading this, you'll get a good idea just how seriously you should be taking your comedy).

Doubling Up

Had a workshop last night with Marilyn Atlas - Not a casting person, like we usually get at ACG, but a manager and producer (She produced, amongst other things, Real Women Have Curves).

Like my last workshop, I wondered afterwards if this was a person I'd really needed to see - An older white woman, she's all about projects reflecting "diversity" (And I don't think giving more opportunities to "older white character actors" is what she means by "diversity") - but as she said herself during the Q&A, "you never know where things are going to lead".

Scene-wise, it was a fun night - there were an odd number of people, so I got to "double-up", and do two very different scenes.

My first time up, I was doing a scene with Pedro, an ACG semi-regular, from the movie Fort Apache The Bronx, a 1981 movie starring Paul Newman.

It was a really good scene - we were two cops, and in the scene, my partner is confronting me about basically executing a suspect (I shoot a guy I'm chasing after he's clearly given up) - but in the room, it didn't come off as well as I'd hoped (It was a mistake for us to sit down, cause it took a lot of energy away from what should have been a high-energy scene); sure enough, when we were done, she said that we didn't get to where we needed to be in the scene till towards the end, so she quizzed us on our characters, told me not to look at Pedro (And told Pedro to do everything he could to get me to look at him), and had us do the first part of the scene again.

I enjoyed the scene, because it was more dramatic than what I typically get to do at these things (And frankly, I think I can make a pretty kick-ass bad guy), but it was disappointing that it didn't really "click".

Afterwards, a couple of "regulars" implied Pedro was the problem (They said between his heavy accent and how quietly he was speaking, you couldn't understand him over the air conditioning), but I blame myself - I don't think it was Pedro, and I don't think it was a problem with our understanding of the scene or our characters; It was a mistake in staging, a mistake as simple as sitting down; a lot of the energy of the confrontation leaked out of the scene.

We should have done the scene standing up, the way we'd worked it when we were outside.

And as the more experienced actor, I should have imposed my will in this situation - Pedro was the one who thought we should sit down - because if I had, I don't think we would have gotten the re-direct.

My second scene was with Molly (Who owns ACG), and it's the first time we've ever done a scene together (As I've said before, I don't get to do scenes with the pretty girls too often. Which is a shame in this case, cause Molly's really good).

I don't remember what the scene was from, but basically we're on an elevator, and Molly's character thinks I'm hitting on her and reads me the riot act (How I'm too old and uncool for her, how I should stick to hitting on women who aren't out of my league, etc.), when I'm really just trying to tell her she has t.p. stuck to her shoe.

Then we find out that I'm "Greg Barney" (Of "Barney, Smith, and Barney", the firm where she works), and things really get interesting.

I'm happy to say, we rocked it, with the only note being that Molly should watch how "animated" her face gets (Because of the "40 foot high movie screen" and all that); it's not a note I've ever heard Molly get before, and it's not something I've ever noticed (And I've seen Molly do a lot of scenes at this point), so I don't think it's really a big "issue".

Anyway, it was a real pleasure getting to do a scene with her - It's always fun when you get to go up with someone you know can do the work (And that's always one of my goals - to be the actor other actors are excited about getting a scene with); you can just relax, and play, and I think that sense of "fun" is infectious.

When it was all over, I considered asking Ms Atlas if she was interested in representing me, but ultimately thought better of it - if/when I look for a new manager, I think I'm going to want someone focused on managing actors.

And in a situation like last night, I feel like if they're not inquiring (About your current representation status), they're clearly not interested in working with you anyway.

The big news today is that I have a callback for Orbitz in a few hours.

I think I have a good shot at it - between my hangdog looks and ability to deliver a deadpan line, I'm great casting for a guy working in the mail room, who informs a passing tour group, "I have a Masters degree" - and that's a good feeling to go into a callback with.

(It's interesting - while I wouldn't want to be this narrowly "typecast" theatrically, in terms of commercials, I'm totally up for having a niche as "Depressed Guy".)

I really want to put something in the "win column" - for all the reasons one normally wants to "put something in the win column", but to also have my first win to report since starting this blog.

Wish me luck...

Serious Fun

There's no real "news" to report, but I do have a few things on my mind today...

To start out on a monetary note: At $73 worth of ad "clicks", I'm getting ever closer to my first check from the good folks at Google, so thank you all for reading and clicking.

I'm most of the way through The War Of Art - It's a brisk read, and definitely worth a look for anyone who's trying to get past the "resistance" in their lives.

The section about "Turning Pro" was especially inspiring, because that's been much on my mind (In terms of acting, and now with this blog); I told myself recently that, while it's okay to not want to work a regular job (Which I've sometimes felt guilty about), and to spend my time doing things I actually want to do, that means I then have to go "full out" on those "things I want to do", and not screw around.

If you want what you do "for fun" to be your life, then, ironically, you have to get pretty serious about your "fun", to make a commitment - "In order to avoid spending the rest of my life doing work I hate and being unhappy, I will invest myself whole-heartedly in doing what I love".

One point Pressfield makes in the book is that the commitment itself - to being a "professional" - changes things.

And I see the truth of that in my experience with this blog - wanting to make money from blogging, then "turning that thought into an action" has, for one thing, immediately meant writing more consistently. Because I know that if people come to this blog one too many times and there's nothing new here, they won't be coming back.

It's meant giving serious thought to what I have to say that might be of value to other people, trying to find the connection between my life and interests and yours as a reader (Which is why I address some of what I write to "aspiring actors").

It has me thinking constantly about what I want to write about in here, and it's even gotten me past my resistance to "marketing myself".

(Unlike acting, where you can spend all kinds of time and money on a mailing that gets no results, when I put a bulletin about this blog on my MySpace page and Diaryland journal, visits to the site immediately go up. And more visits means more readers, and more readers means more "clicks" on my ad, and more clicks on my ad means more money. And even though the money is pretty minimal right now, it's been surprisingly motivating).

Speaking of "professionals", the next book on my list, after The War Of Art, is Steve Martin's book Born Standing Up, just out in paperback.

Steve Martin was never my favorite stand-up comic, because I was always more interested in stand-up that at least seemed to come from a personal point-of-view, and his stand-up was clearly "performance art" that had nothing to do with Steve Martin, the person (If anything, his act seem designed to obscure "Steve Martin, the person").

But that said, I've always been interested in performance art, and in comedy, and I'm intrigued that this seemingly anarchic, absurd comedy act - Which was hugely successful "back in the day" - was in actuality, a very carefully crafted and well thought-out construction.

I don't want to rattle on for too much longer, but I'm still thinking about my last casting workshop...

I was actually trying to write about this last night - particularly about scenes that "worked" and scenes that didn't, and why - but I found myself getting bogged down in the intersection between cold-reading skills, personal presentation, and acting ability - all of which enter into the picture - so I've got to give it some more thought (But I do want to write about the general idea of what makes scenes "work" or not, because I think it's interesting and instructive).

For me, there's always a "competitive element" to workshops, because I want to be one of "the cool kids" who stand out in their scene - Because I'm a show-off , first of all.

But also because, on a professional level, I want to be one of the people that the casting person remembers once they leave the room at the end of the night. Because really, that's the only reason to do these things.

And that "competitive element" was really ramped-up for me on Saturday, because the casting person had a number of us reading the same scenes - For example, two other actors read the same scene from The Starter Wife that I had.

I was the first one up doing "the agent scene", and of the three, I was the only one not given a re-direct. And I don't mind telling you, I was very proud of myself.

(Most casting people who come in don't state it outright, but the casting person on Saturday actually said at one point, to the people who'd gotten re-directs, "Your second reading should have been your first one".)

While not all re-directs are created equal - Sometimes the casting person sees you have the right idea and wants to help you get where you're going, or sometimes they see that you've really got the goods, and just want to "take you for a test drive", and see how you handle direction - more often than not, in my experience at these things, a re-direct simply means that, for whatever reason, the scene didn't "work" for the casting person.

And you don't want that. Because in an actual audition situation, that first time through might be the only time you get.

One more thing about Saturday, and being a "professional", and then I'm done.

One of the girls who'd gotten a re-direct had been directed to "speak up" when she came back.

When it was time for her to do her scene again, she was a little louder, but still speaking in a lower-than-normal volume, and much like speaking too slowly or taking long pauses in a scene, it meant the scene didn't have very much energy.

When she was done, the casting person said the scene was better - and it had been - but that she still needed to speak up.

And the girl started going on about how she'd been loud as a child, and had always been told to "be quiet", and now it was hard for her to raise her voice, etc.

Afterwards Jen, one of the "regulars", and probably the most successful person who comes to workshops, was horrified - she said, and I believe I'm quoting here, "No one wants to hear that fucking bullshit".

And her point, acting hopefuls, while vividly expressed, is well-taken; a casting person is not your friend, your confidante, your priest, or your therapist. They don't want you to complain, or explain. They don't want your life story.

They just want you to be a great actor.

And if you start going on about why you can't do what they want you to do, guess what?

You don't get the job.

(Thus endeth the lesson...)

A Pregnant Pause

Yesterday's workshop was with Abby Marateck, an associate from Schiff/Audino, the office that casts The Starter Wife (Which I haven't seen - shame on me!), and Mad Men (Which, in my opinion, is one of the best things on tv).

Ms M. was very pregnant (By "very", I mean her due date is in two weeks). So between the fact that she's going to be out on maternity leave for who-knows-how-long, and they're down to shooting the last couple episodes of The Starter Wife for the year (And Mad Men is already done), I'm not sure how worthwhile this workshop will have turned out to be.

But who knows? Hopefully, she'll go back to work, and the very first thing that crosses her desk will have a role perfect for Yours Truly.

We read with her - which she seemed to think was going to be weird for us, but it's something other casting people have done as well(As opposed to pairing actors up), to make it "more like a real casting session".

But she did do some other things differently; she moved things around so she and the actor reading the scene were perpendicular to the rest of us; so instead of watching the actor onstage from her perspective, we were watching her run a "casting session".

And when people were done, if she had a re-direct, she gave it to the person, moved on, then had all the people who'd gotten re-directs take another couple minutes with their scenes, then go again (Typically, the casting person gives a re-direct, if they've got one, and has the actor do it again immediately).

I had a nice scene from Starter Wife, as an agent - it was fun, and I immediately felt like I knew what to do with it.

Even so, I was more nervous than usual when my time came. Not sure why, but I was.

But my first instinct was right - I knew the scene was fun, and I knew what to do with it, so I didn't have any problem; when I finished, the casting person said I'd made "strong, clear choices", didn't have a re-direct for me, and put me in "the good pile" (I'm not sure she used that phrase, exactly, but basically, the people who weren't getting re-directs were the people she would have put through to the producers in a real casting situation. Which to me makes it "the good pile").

It was interesting to watch the other actors going up with a more critical eye (Which I think may have been Ms M's intent). And I guess I have a pretty good eye for casting, because of all the people I watched, I was only "off" on one or two (That I would have put through, and she gave re-directs to, or vice-versa).

If you're a young actor reading this, the biggest thing I notice, in general, with scenes that don't "work", and I've seen a lot of them at this point, is that usually the actor is going way too slowly - either speaking too slowly, pausing for way too long, or both. It drains the life out of a drama, and absolutely kills comedy.

I want to write about that at greater length (why scenes "work" or "don't work"), cause I think it's interesting (And may be interesting to you as well, particularly if you're an aspiring actor), but my weekly Weight Watchers meeting is calling.

Resisting Resistance

I want to write about yesterday's workshop, because I thought it was particularly interesting.

But I'm pulling a serious fade right now, and it would take more time and energy than I have to give it it's due.

So I'm going to save that entry for tomorrow, and just tell you that I'm really enjoying The War Of Art - It feels like the rare self-help book that could actually make a difference in how I run my life.

I came out to LA to make a living as an actor, and in a larger sense, to be the person I feel I'm meant to be. To express myself, and at the same time, to be part of something larger than myself.

To do that, I'm going to have to get out of my own way.

And keep getting out of my own way.

Cause, for me, the The War Of Art is a war worth fighting.

"The War Of Art"

I've just started reading The War Of Art, by Steven Pressfield (Subtitled, "Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles").

The book concerns a phenomenon called "resistance", where our minds fight

...any act that rejects immediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity. Or expressed another way, any act that derives from our higher nature instead of our lower.

I've wrestled with - and typically lost to - "resistance" all my life.

So it was a huge "win" when I overcame a lifetime of resistance, and came out to Los Angeles to become a professional actor; I'd made little "feints" in that direction over the years, but had never made a full-on, life-altering commitment to the idea.

Another victory is currently being won on the weight-loss front (Anyone reading this who's tried to lose weight before knows what I mean about "resistance").

This blog is also a victory over the forces of resistance - The idea of making money doing something I enjoy, something I'd been doing for free for years, was very appealing. But nevertheless, it was a struggle to get from "there" to "here".

The next front in the ongoing war is theater - I want to do theater, and it would be good for me to do theater, but here I am - not doing theater.

One thing I realized recently is that it's no good to make one bold decision about your life, then sit back and relax, patting yourself on the back for the "bold decision" you made - You have to keep making those bold decisions, because resistance doesn't go away.

The "War" goes on.

And somewhere down the line, I've got a book to write, drawings to draw, and a standup routine to perform.

But since I've gotten about four hours of sleep, and I have a casting workshop at 1:00, right now I've got a nap to take...

Land of the Free, Home of the Morbidly Obese

This past October, I started going to Weight Watchers; a friend bought me an initial 10-week membership (I joke that she was tired of hearing me whine about my appearance, but I really think she was just concerned for me), and I took things from there.

As of my last weigh-in, I've lost over 63 lbs (To be precise, I've gone from 268.4 lbs to 204.8 lbs). And by the time I've gotten to my goal weight - and maybe a few pounds past it, for good measure - I'll have lost at least 75 lbs.

This relates to acting, and in particular, to my being a "character man", because a reason I wanted to lose weight in the first place was because I didn't want to just be cast in "fat schlub" roles.

Now, being the worrier I am, I'm afraid that because I'm not a "fat schlub" anymore, I won't get cast at all.

Part of the problem is an unfortunate coincidence - I've chosen to lose this large amount of weight the same year things have been all topsy-turvy in the business. So it's easy to turn not getting auditions/bookings because of the wacky goings-on between SAG and the AMPTP into not getting auditions/bookings because no one wants to cast me as a skinny guy (For the record, I'm 6'2" - So I wouldn't say I'm "skinny" just yet...but I'm getting there).

But while it's true there will be roles I'm no longer "right" for because of my reduced tonnage, it's also true there will be roles for "the new me" as well (And I'd theorize that since those "new me" roles will "match up" better with the way I see myself inside - as a guy who isn't a "fat schlub" - I'll be better prepared to audition for, and book, those roles).

And ultimately, even if there are more roles out there for "Fat Character Man" than "Skinny Character Man" - because we're in America, after all, "Land Of The Free, And The Home Of The Morbidly Obese" - I can't, for my own health and happiness, make a decision to be a big fat man.

When I get my big break, and see myself on the big screen, that's not the guy I want to see.

Don't Forget Your Headshots

I left something out of my last post, and it's kind of important, if any acting hopefuls are reading this...

Getting ready for the workshop on Tuesday, I stapled a copy of my resume to a headshot.

Then I took a shower, got dressed, grabbed my headshot folder and the book I'm currently reading (The End Of Faith), and headed out to the Metro station.

It wasn't till I got to the ACG space in Studio City, and went to put my headshot on the table, that I realized something had gone terribly wrong - I'd never actually gotten my headshot into my headshot folder; it was still at home, lying on my bedside table, where it wasn't going to do anyone any good.

I was horrified.

Not having a headshot for the casting person is so amateur-hour (As an actor, your headshot is a combination business card and job application), I was tempted to just eat the money and go home, rather than start out making such a bad impression (the casting person hadn't gotten there yet).

But Molly convinced me it wasn't that big a deal (even though it really was), so I stayed.

And I did scrounge up a postcard with my picture and agency info on it, the textbook definition of "better than nothing" (And my scene with Tammy D. went so well that I was glad I hung around; at the beginning of the evening, the casting person might have thought, "Who's this loser that doesn't even have a headshot...?", but by the end, she was thinking, "That loser who didn't even have a headshot is a pretty good actor").

So the lesson here is - always make sure you have your headshots before you head off to your audition or workshop (Actually, you should always have a number of headshots with you, to cover any possible contingencies). Because you don't want a casting person's first impression of you to be as someone who doesn't have their act together.

Anyway...

Yesterday's audition (for "Orbitz", the online travel service, not "Orbit", the gum) went quite well, I thought.

It was a funny spot, and I like funny (And the deadpan, slightly depressed, weary character they seemed to want is something I can do very well).

So we'll see.

Whether or not anything comes of Tuesday's workshop, or this commercial audition, they were both fun, and I left each feeling I'd done my best.

It's important that the effort to get where you're going is fun. Otherwise, why bother?

Particularly as an actor - You're going to spend much more time trying to act than actually acting, so you'd better be up for that, and figure out how to enjoy the chase.

Or else, you better just go home and forget about it.

It's something, in mid-life, that's becoming increasingly important to me, that I figure out how to enjoy the life I have, as it's happening, and not wait until some magical day when I'm a successful actor before I allow myself to be happy.

A Good Night

Had a workshop last night with Jamie Castro, an associate from Lowy/Brace Casting, the office that does Gray's Anatomy, Private Practice, and Friday Night Lights, along with some new show called The Washingtonian.

(I've done workshops with Will Stewart, a former Lowy/Brace associate who's now a CD himself, but never with Ms Castro. Who was really cute, by the way.)

It was a good night - Happily, I was paired with Tammy D., a regular who almost always hits home runs with her scenes, and we got a good one (As a couple in therapy because we've never once had sex during our four-year marriage).

We went over it outside, working the lines, and talking over the relationship enough to know we were on the same page with how to play the scene (In addition to seeing a lot of each other's work, we've been paired up a couple times before, so we're very comfortable working together).

When it was time to go back in, we went up early on, did our thing, and got a very good response.

Then Ms Castro gave us some backstory (The reason we've never had sex is because I'm not attracted to her - I like "big" women), and she had us do it again.

The scene had "worked" well the first time around - even the casting person said so - but the re-direct added an interesting wrinkle (I was much more guilty and uncomfortable the second time around, since it was my fault we were there).

Long story short, it was fun, and I know we both made a great impression, and that's what I'm looking for at these things.

Adding to the acting fun, I have a commercial audition later today - For Orbit, the online travel service (This is at least the third time I've gone in for an Orbit commercial. So hopefully, third time's the charm...).

So I should get myself to bed, since I have a (relatively) early day tomorrow...

Waiting By The Phone

Yesterday, I watched Rainn Wilson on Life After Film School.

At one point he said, as I've heard many, many other actors say, that you have to generate your own work, "...otherwise you're constantly waiting by the phone for the next audition, the next job, the next whatever, and that's no fun".

And he's right - it's kinda not (Getting the call is kinda cool...but it doesn't happen often enough. And you don't want to be constantly in the position where you can't do what you do until someone tells you you can).

On my other blog, I was just writing, at some length, about how I needed to be more "fearless", in my writing and acting, and how I needed to act because I'm an actor (And that's what I should be doing), and also because, as I said in here yesterday, casting people aren't going to see what I can do and be excited about it till I show them something.

And if I'm going to write an ongoing blog about acting and my acting career, and hope it'll be interesting enough to attract, and keep, long-term readers, I should actually act at some point.

Just a thought.

Living Vicariously Through Molly

Well, my friend Molly had her audition for CSI Miami earlier today.

I was at her house last night (She and her roommate Jen, also an actress, invite people over on a standing basis for Sunday dinner), and at one point, I ran lines with her; it's the kind of stuff you've seen on "procedurals" a zillion times - cops asking the techno-geek what they've come up with off the broken computer - and Molly did a great job of "tossing off" the techno-speak while still sounding like a person.

But back to today; I emailed her after I got home last night, for a final "Break a leg", and she emailed me back after the audition; basically, she felt good about it in the room, which is nice (And that was a pretty important room).

So now's there's nothing to do but wait, and hope she gets the nod.

Nobody's nodding in my direction right now; technically, I'm still on "avail" for Wizards Of Waverly Place, but it seems pretty clear nothing's going to come of that, so at this point, it's on to the next thing.

Whenever that comes up...

I've seen a number of commercials on tv lately that I auditioned for, but didn't get (One night, I saw three in the span of an hour).

I always feel a little twinge when that happens - from missing out on the fun of the shoot, missing out on people seeing me on tv, and maybe most importantly, for commercials, for missing out on the sweet, sweet, money.

Theatrically or commercially - hopefully both - my time's coming. I've booked before, and I will undoubtedly book again.

While at Jen and Molly's last night, I said the only way anything was really going to happen for me is if people actually see what I can do.

Pretty bold, egotistical statement, but I think there's something to it.

Now all I have to do is figure out what it is I do that I think is so compelling, and figure out how to get people to see it.

Nice news regarding this blog: As of today, I've passed the halfway mark to getting my first check.

So thanks for reading, and thanks for clicking on the little ad. You're making my life just a little more fun, and a little more profitable.

This Is What Happens When I Don't Get Off At A Workshop...

My workshop today - with Kevin Mockrin from Junie Lowry Johnson's office - was pretty disappointing.

Instead of putting us with partners, we read with him (On the whole, I prefer having a scene partner at these things. But reading opposite the casting person is better "practice", really, since that's what you'll be doing at an actual audition - reading with the casting person, or a "reader").

He gave me a very short scene from Desperate Housewives (Gaby is asking her priest - played by Yours Truly - to marry her and Carlos, just two weeks after the death of her husband Victor).

The scene was short, not uproariously funny, in my opinion, and the priest doesn't have much to do in the scene beyond register his chagrin at Gaby's behavior. I just didn't feel there was much to "work with"; basically, it's Gaby's scene (He should have given the scene to a woman, while he read the priest).

I did okay with it, and got some laughs ("Yes Gaby, the nine a.m. mass is still at nine a.m."). But "doing okay" and "getting some laughs" is not what I'm looking for at workshops, cause I'm pretty sure casting people don't come away from these things remembering the people who did "okay".

The actor who wants these workshops to pay off with work, not to mention the actor who wants to strut his stuff and gain/keep the respect of his fellows actors, wants scenes he can fly with, not scenes where the "reader" gets all the best lines.

(But to play "Devil's Advocate" with myself for a moment - Yes, I want to get really funny or dramatic scenes, whatever the case may be, that show the casting person just what I can do. Why wouldn't I? But the reality - for now, anyway - is that the kind of thing I did today is the kind of thing I could actually get called in for. And as I recall when I saw the actual episode, the guy playing the priest didn't bring the house down either...because, after all, the show isn't called Desperate Priests.)

But, long story short, I didn't get my acting rocks off today, and frankly, I felt jealous of the people who did.

For the record, this isn't the first time I've had this frustration (Sometimes I get good scenes, but often, I get scenes pretty much like today), and I'm betting it won't be the last time, but I'll spare you the full-on rant for now.

Afterwards, Molly told me she had an audition on Monday with Nan Dutton, for a "recurring" role on CSI Miami.

Pretty big deal, to go from not having your SAG card yet, to going in for a recurring role on a network show.

She got it because Ken (Her roommate Jen's boyfriend, who's going to be a villain on this coming season of Heroes), mentioned her name in passing to Nan Dutton...on a day he was juggling three auditions (For the record, I've had two auditions so far this month. But anyway...).

She wants to book it, of course, and I want her to book it, but I also told her that, whatever happens, it's a huge "win" - if she goes in and does well (Which she will), and for whatever reason, doesn't book the part (If she loses out to someone better known, for example), they'll still have seen her - she'll be "on their radar", and it won't be the last time she'll get in that office (For the record, the only part of this I said to Molly was that it was "a huge win").

While I don't begrudge Molly this opportunity at all - I recently wrote that she's "completely ready for the big leagues", or words to that effect - I just wish I were getting opportunities like that.

I really do.

Well, this just isn't going to be my most positive entry; I'm feeling a little "poopy" right now.

But while my goal on this blog is to be positive more often than not (In here, and in life in general), I also can't shy away from the fact that being a professional actor also involves wrestling with doubt and insecurity and other unpleasant, unsavory emotions.

And to succeed, you have to work through that crap, and come out on the other side.

And I will, trust me...just not right now.

(And I still want to write about those movies I saw yesterday. But I think at this point, we'd all be better served if I went outside and took a walk.)

Double-Featured

Had a very fun movie double-feature yesterday.

In the morning, I saw Tropic Thunder (At the nearby M-Park 4, the theater I discovered has been four blocks away for about the past two years).

Then, late afternoon, I saw Vicky Cristina Barcelona in Los Feliz.

Very different movies, clearly, but both very enjoyable.

I particularly enjoyed "Vicky Cristina" - funny, sexy, thought-provoking, it's the best Woody Allen movie I've seen in years (Though prior to Match Point, which I liked but didn't love, I hadn't seen a Woody Allen movie in the theater in years).

(I'm going to write about these movies more at length in my next entry, but I haven't given myself much time to write at this point - I'm off to a workshop shortly - so I'm going to move on.)

The last movie I saw before yesterday's double-feature was Pineapple Express.

The primary reason to see that movie is James Franco, who's hilarious as the perpetually stoned pot dealer/friend of Seth Rogen's character (Rogen's good, but is basically doing the "Seth Rogan character" we've seen before).

Franco is so good in this movie, and so not good in movies where he's playing "straight", that it made me think of Brad Pitt, who I also think does much better in character roles than as a straight leading man.

I'd already been thinking about it, but Franco's performance really got me wondering about what my "sweet spot" might be as an actor. I mean, I want to think I'm "versatile" and can do anything, but what do I think I do particularly well, what roles would just come naturally to me?

But again, I've picked the wrong time to blog, cause I've gotta get my character-acting ass out the door - my workshop beckons.

Karaoke-ing The Night Away

Well, karaoke was great fun last night.

I was a bit nonplussed when, after putting in my first song request ("Keep Your Hands To Yourself" by the Georgia Satellites), the DJ came out and told me that cd had been lost or destroyed or stolen - I've forgotten which - and was thus not available.

But after that little karaoke "hiccup" - And forgetting my imminently forgettable rendition of "How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You)" (My first song of the evening) - I did manage to get my performing rocks off; I only did one more solo (Cameo's "Word Up", which always goes over well), but I got up with four people to do "Bust A Move" (Which I've tried a couple of times solo, but never gotten all the way through it without stumbling over myself), worked a harmonica solo into some country song I've forgotten now, and did the recitative(sp?) section of "Are You Lonely Tonite?", Elvis-style (Jon, who runs the agency, was singing).

And unlike some past outings, we had a great turnout, and a number of people who were really entertaining onstage, who could either actually sing, were savvy performers, or both (One couple - Steven and Saskia - met when they were in The Lion King on Broadway, so yeah - they were pretty good).

All in all, a nice night.

Stealing From Jason Lee

Remember how I decided to karaoke with folks from my commercial agency tomorrow night instead of attend a scheduled workshop? And how I'd felt guilty about it, but decided it was "important" to just have fun every-once-in-a-while?

Well, the workshop has now been canceled altogether.

But not because of me - the casting person who was coming in is pregnant, is apparently due any minute, and has been ordered to bed by her doctor.

Which makes me want to say how "everything works out for the best"...except for the fact that, as I've said before, workshop cancellations are happening more often these days, for one reason or another, and that's not good for ACG (Or for Molly, who's trying to make a living running ACG).

But anyway...last night's workshop, with Jayme Singer - from Dava Waite Casting (The office that casts Weeds and My Name Is Earl) - went very well.

This was the third time I've done a workshop with the express purpose of getting seen for My Name Is Earl, a show I'm totally right for - Nick Anderson used to be an associate there, but has since moved to Junie Lowry-Johnson, and Kari Kurto now has her own casting office (Nick, who I did a workshop and a special, 4-week "comedy intensive" with, has never called me in; Kari called me in for a two line co-star on Weeds that I didn't book).

When Ms Singer started handing out scenes, I had a feeling I was going to get paired with the other older, "distinctive-looking" actor there (In the real world, I interact with attractive people fairly often. But the world of workshop scenes is much more segregated) - and that's exactly how it went down.

(At the time, I thought my partner was the same bad actor I got stuck with at a recent workshop, doing a scene from NCIS, and I was crestfallen. But now I'm actually not sure if it was the same guy or not, since I've tried to burn that night from my memory.
But anyway...)

We got a scene from "Earl" (For fans of the show, it was the scene where Earl has slept with his friend Ralph's mother, leading Ralph to decide, somewhat sadly, that the only reasonable thing to do is kill Earl...after giving him 12 hours to get his affairs in order; I was playing Earl, and my partner was Ralph).

At one point, I asked my partner if he'd seen the episode in question - he hadn't - so I told him that Ralph had been played by Giovanni Ribisi, and that, "in my opinion", the "funny" in the scene comes from just how deadpan Ralph is about his decision to kill Earl (Actually, it's not totally "deadpan". It's more like "deadpan-shaded-with-low-key-regret").

Typically, in a play or on a set, it's considered "bad form" to give direction to another actor, so I'm always very hesitant about giving "advice" or "suggestions" to a workshop partner.

But since, in this situation, there's no "director", and I've paid good money to be seen by this casting person, and I don't want to look bad (Because casting directors have long memories), I will offer my opinions if my partner seems amenable to it, and I feel like I really have something helpful to offer.

Anyway, we went over the scene a number of times, got called back inside, and went up fairly early on.

And while nothing terribly interesting or funny had happened when we were working the scene outside, it went over like gangbusters in the room (Patrick R., one of the "regulars", pronounced it "the best scene of the evening"); Tim (my scene partner) was spot-on, and I did what I needed to do as well (More on that in a moment).

The casting person said it was very funny, didn't have a "re-direct" (Which always makes me happy), and we were done.

So now if you end up seeing me on "Earl" this year, you'll know how it happened.

(Molly also had a great scene - she pretty much always does. She doesn't have her SAG card yet, but she's totally ready for the big time - and a girl I'd never seen before was so good I told her afterwards she was going to be fronting her own sit-com within the next five years.)

When the workshop was over, a group of "regulars" went to Miceli's, an Italian restaurant nearby, and chatted about this and that, which was great fun.

(There was some worrisome gossip about Brett, my manager, but I'm not going to "report" on it here till I have more details.)

Oh, I was going to elaborate on "doing what I needed to do" in my scene last night...

I don't know if it's really a "dilemma", or if it's just a dilemma in my own mind, but since I'm usually doing very familiar scenes at these things (Mostly from tv, but sometimes from movies), I've sometimes felt in a bind, wondering whether I'm better off trying to emulate the actor who actually did the scene - particularly if I've seen the episode in question - or trying consciously not to.

The more I think about this, the more I think it could be an entire entry in itself (I was once given the "spider in the bathroom" scene from Annie Hall, such a Woody Allen-specific scene - and I bear no resemblance to Woody Allen - that it felt like deliberate sabotage on the part of the casting director).

But I will say, in this particular instance, I opted to, as much as possible, emulate (i.e. steal) as much of Jason Lee's performance as possible. Because I feel like it's such a distinctive character that to do something different just for the sake of being different would just make me come off badly.

And I think, since I have a good ear and a good sense of comedy (And can do the dialect well), but am not a mimic per se, I came off looking like I know how to do comedy - particularly this comedy - and would be a good "fit" for the show.

At least that's what I'm hoping (Who knows? Maybe it'll turn out Earl has a long-lost uncle).

And on that note, I think I'm going to close, and go for a walk.

Are We Having Fun Yet?

I was hoping, by the time I wrote my next entry here, that I'd be telling you I booked Wizards Of Waverly Place.

But alas - While I may still get the call, I haven't gotten it yet. And since I want to keep this little venture humming along, by writing on a regular basis, I don't have time to wait.

(To the acting newcomer: What I'm doing right now - obsessing over a potential gig - is pretty much the worst thing you can do as an actor. It'll make you crazier than you no doubt already are. So you can read about me doing it...but never do it yourself.)

So beyond eying my cell phone, waiting for "the call", what's going on in my acting world this week?

Well, I have two casting workshops (I can't even tell you what offices they're from - all I've got written on my calendar are the names of the associates I'm seeing).

It was going to be three workshops - one tonite, one Thursday night, and one on Saturday afternoon - but I canceled Thursday's, because it conflicted with a rare karaoke outing organized by my commercial agent.

I was actually uncomfortable canceling a workshop in favor of karaoke; while karaoke has some value as "networking", it's mostly "just for fun", while getting in front of a given casting office can be pretty important to your career.

But that's just it - Your life, anyone's life, shouldn't be just about your "career".

It's important, every so often, to just have fun.

More "Wizards" News

I was going to start this entry off with some comments about Pineapple Express, which I saw on Friday.

But I just got a call from my agent - the Wizards of Waverly Place folks emailed her, and want to "put a pin in me" from the 13th-19th.

And what does that mean, exactly?

I'm embarrassed to admit I don't actually know - neither my commercial agent or my manager use that particularly phraseology - and I was too embarrassed to admit my ignorance to ask.

But what I think it means is that I'm "on avail". And that means "You're on the short list, so keep your schedule open on these days till we tell you otherwise...just in case".

In any case, it's fun news.

And I feel pretty well-positioned to deal with whatever happens; if I get it, that'll be good for all the reasons previously mentioned (Credit, experience, etc). And if I don't get it, it won't be that big a loss (Because it's an Aftra gig, and I'll have to join the union. Meaning the check I'll get for the gig will go away soon as I get it).

When something like this happens, it's just nice to feel like "I'm in the game".

Three Cheers For "Happy Little Surprises"

Since I didn't hear anything yesterday, I'm assuming the Wizards Of Waverly Place thing isn't happening.

Mildly disappointing, but not a big loss (Did I mention I wouldn't have made any money off it, because of having to sign up with AFTRA?).

Long story short, I want to get everything I go out for, but some things I want more than others.

(That said, I'm open to being happily surprised when I get "the call" on Monday.)

Yesterday's commercial audition for the NFL went well, I thought.

I was going in for the part of a guy on a film crew. And they had us go in in groups of three.

The premise is that we're the crew of a horror movie, grouped around a monitor, much more interested in the football game we're watching than what's happening on the set.

At the same time they had actors in for "crew members", they were also auditioning "ingenues" for the "Horror Movie" in the other room. So while we waited to go in and do our thing, we'd periodically hear blood-curdling screams from inside, which I found pretty funny - I enjoy surreal little moments like that at auditions, since it reminds me where I am.

When my group of three went in, they had us improvise watching the game (with the camera standing in as "the game"); we did two takes, the first with the game going our way, and the second with our team losing (Though we were instructed to, basically, not go nuts with our reactions either time).

I was glad one of my fellow actors - a huge guy who would have made pre-Weight Watchers me look skinny - took the lead with the "football talk". Cause left to my own devices, I would have just embarrassed myself (I'm not a "sports guy").

So anyway, callbacks for that will be next week - I think Wednesday - and I'll be surprised (And not in a good way)if I don't get the callback.

And speaking of commercials (And surprises) - there was a check from JS (My commercial agent) in yesterday's mail, for "wildspot" airings of my AT&T Yellow Pages commercial that I shot earlier this year.

Not a game-altering amount of money - just a pinch under $200 - but something that'll pay a couple bills, or groceries for the month, so that's cool.

And speaking of not game-altering amounts of money (Not yet, anyway), I also received my Google AdSense pin # in yesterday's mail).

I promptly went online and put it in, and now I'm totally good to go, with everything on the up-and-up.

Well, as I sometimes say in my other journal, I could go on, but then I wouldn't be sleeping...

Not Quite "Magical"...But Close

Well, I don't know if I'd say the Wizards Of Waverly Place audition today was "magical"...but it did go very well.

When I got there and signed in, there were two other guys ahead of me, two younger, good-looking fellas.

They were so good-looking, I actually thought "That's all wrong - guys this good-looking are in front of the camera, not behind it".

(For the record, I've been cast as a "paparazzi" - Or would that be "paparazzo"? - in two commercials. I'm just saying.)

The two pretty-boys were in and out very quickly, but I assumed that was just how quickly things were moving, and didn't think much of it.

But when I went in and read with the casting person, we did it once, then he asked if I did accents.

And I don't remember what I said in reply, but it was something vaguely in the affirmative, so he asked me to do it again, try an accent (The scene is supposed to be taking place in Egypt), and do it "with even more energy".

And I did, doing an "accent" I'd define as "something vaguely Middle-Eastern".

Then he said they were going to "put me on tape", and asked me to step out for a moment.

When he called me back in, there were two more people in the room, two women. I don't remember their names, or if I was told what positions they held - but they were clearly decision-makers (And in this game, it's basically, "the more people in the room, the better", so I was happy to see them, whoever they were).

So I did the scene again on camera, and the vibe in the room afterwards was very positive.

So we'll see what happens.

It's an AFTRA show, which means 1) It doesn't pay as much as a SAG show, and 2) Since I'm an AFTRA "must join" at this point - because of a small 4-episode part I did on Passions last year - if I actually book the job, my shoot fee will be applied to my membership.

So financially, getting the job will be meaningless, at least in the short term.

But disappointing as that was to realize, I still would like to book it - for the credit, for the experience, for "bragging rights", what-have-you.

But while we're on the subject of "finances"...

I have a commercial audition tomorrow, a national commercial for the NFL.

And booking that would be "financially meaningful", so wish me luck.

(Hey, you know what? I think, just to "cover my bases", I'm going to go ahead and book both of them.)

A Long-Awaited Theatrical Audition

In the month since starting this blog, I've worried a bit over my timing - "Nice job, Dude - Start up a blog about your acting career right when things have pretty much stalled out...".

So I'm happy to report that Direct Talent (My theatrical agency) called last night, and I have an audition for the Disney Channel show The Wizards Of Waverly Place in just a few hours.

I've never seen the show, so I looked it up online, then downloaded an episode off I-Tunes (So a big "Hip, Hip, Hooray!" for modern technology).

It's cute (At least the episode I saw - Maybe somewhere down the line it takes a dark turn towards extreme sex and violence and "adult situations". But it's Disney, so I'm guessing not).

If you're new to the biz and you missed it, it's very important that you actually know the show you're going in for. If you can't actually see an episode, at least look it up online so you're not just going in blind.

I'm going in for the role of "Photographer", and I have a little three-line "scene" with two of the principals.

So it should be fun.

But I'll have more to say about this later - Right now, I've got to go book a gig.

Thoughts On "The Dark Knight"

(Okay, I have visitors, I'm getting comments, and people are clicking on my ad, which makes it official: I'm a happy camper. But anyway...)

I was supposed to have a workshop last night, but it was canceled due to lack-of-interest (Only four people signed up).

So since I had a little unexpected time on my hands, I saw The Dark Knight again (I don't typically see movies more than once anymore - partly because of money constraints, and partly because most movies don't really warrant it. But this movie is, in my opinion, worth a second look).

Once again, I marveled at Heath Ledger's "Joker".

As an actor, I have all kinds of questions about the performance that will probably never be answered - How much of the performance did he come onto the set with, and how much was worked out during shooting? Were all of his asides and little bits of business indicated in the script, or did he improvise some of them? Did he create a backstory for his character? Did he create his character from the outside-in, or from the inside-out? Did he get to offer any feedback on his "look"? - but long story short, however he did what he did, it's an amazing performance, a cinematic villain-for-the-ages.

In other words, color me impressed.

And after seeing this performance, for a second time now, I'm more saddened than ever that we lost such a talented, versatile actor so early.

I want to address two other things that seem to be big topics of discussion about the movie...

1. Christian Bale's "Batman voice".

I was less distracted/put off by it the second time around, but it was still...problematic.

As an actor, I totally "get" it - You're a guy dressed as a bat. You're playing a scary character , so you have to have a scary voice (Beyond that, you have to do something vocally to help "the suspension of disbelief". Otherwise, the audience would wonder why people weren't "putting two-and-two together" - "Gee, Batman sounds exactly like billionaire industrialist Bruce Wayne...").

But the trouble with "the voice" is that it's too one-note and inflexible.

Worse, it sounds, to my ears, too "put-on" - that's not a guy with a low, raspy, threatening voice, that's a guy affecting a low, raspy, threatening voice.

I don't know quite what you do about it. Have him work more with a vocal coach? Alter it mechanically? (Certainly "Lucius Fox" could come up with something.)

Maybe get Clint Eastwood to come in and dub his lines?

(Eastwood would have been a kick-ass "Batman" back-in-the-day. Though he would have sucked as "Bruce Wayne".)

Or maybe since the movie has made a Ba-jillion dollars at this point, they'll chose to just leave well enough alone.

2. Maggie Gyllenhall's looks/attractiveness/sex appeal.

While Katie Holmes got raked over the coals for her work in the first movie - I personally think she was mis-cast, but not egregiously awful - Miss Gyllenhall has been ripped to shreds in some quarters for being too "fugly" to be the "romantic interest" in this, or any, film.

I have to assume, since I've read this criticism almost entirely on the Internet, that the detractors are probably young guys, who aren't yet hip to the sexiness of "the total package". Cause personally, I think M.G. is plenty sexy; I actually like her looks (I think she's got beautiful eyes and a very pretty smile), but beyond that, she's smart and funny and talented, and "smart and funny and talented" always turns me on.

Well, I could keep waxing lyrical about the movie - As a "Batman" fan since I was in single digits, I think The Dark Knight is the best "Batman" movie yet - but if you're reading this and you've seen the movie, I'm actually more interested in what you thought.

Comments?

Help Me Help Myself

Well, beyond that little bit of busy-ness last month (When I had three commercial auditions and a callback in the span of two weeks), things have been slow, slow, slow, on the acting front.

It can be hard, when it's slow like this, to "keep your spirits up", and not give over to fearful, negative thinking (Especially if you're really good at fearful, negative thinking, like I am). But if you're "in the biz" for the long haul, slow times are going to happen, and you just have to "keep the faith" that they won't last forever.

(According to the latest SAG emails I've been getting, SAG is continuing to "unofficially" negotiate with the AMPTP - through various sub-committees and back-channels - so hopefully, that'll mean more auditions, and more gigs, for Yours Truly, before too much longer.)

I was at Jen and Molly's house last night - two actor friends I met through the Actors Co-op Group (Molly runs the group now, and Jen sometimes helps her with auditioning potential new members) - and it's been slow for them as well (And Jen, in particular, had a two year period where she was having a great amount of success, more than Yours Truly).

We talked for awhile about theater, and how much we miss it (Like me, they both have a lot of musical theater experience, so we all had that in common), about acting classes, about marketing, and about how, while we all want to get auditions and book jobs, we also long to have acting be "fun" again.

That's been a big "issue" for me - It's been discouraging that, after over seven years, the most fun I have acting out here (The most "acting" I do period) happens at casting workshops where I'm paying people to watch me.

It's not quite what I had in mind when I first came out here.

But again, you have to "keep the faith". I know I have talent, I know I'm funny, I know I have a distinctive "look", and I'm not going to quit.

Which brings me to "marketing".

One thing you're supposed to do, one thing you have to do, as a professional actor, is market yourself. And it's something I've never really done, for various and sundry reasons - from the fact that it's expensive, and I usually haven't had the money, to the fact that it's tedious (And I don't like tedium), to the fact that I don't really believe most of the marketing actors do (At least of the "sending out postcards" variety) really does any good.

(I could easily do an entire entry - maybe even a series of entries - on my resistance to marketing myself.)

But it seems clear that since my "team" isn't getting me out there - I have a manager, a theatrical agent, and a commercial agent - and I'm not getting any younger, I need to figure out how to take matters more into my own hands.

Which has me thinking about theater again.

I think I'd be more enthused about "marketing" myself if there was something I was proud of marketing (My appearance in a genuinely funny or dramatic play or performance piece, for example). Not to mention meeting more people - "networking" is also a critical piece of the puzzle that I've largely been missing - who might be important to me down the line, or who might lead me to the people who are.

So the life I'm hoping to set up for myself out here, in a post-ArcLight theater/post-crappy-jobs-in-general world, and the life I want to be having in the very near future, is one where I'm doing the Weight Watchers thing (I've been in Weight Watchers since October, losing almost 60 lbs to date. And as of my most recent weigh-in on Sunday, I'm four pounds away from being able to work there), getting commercials and tv co-star things (And down the road, guest-star things and feature roles), and doing theater/live performing at night.

I think my main resistance to marketing, in terms of sending out postcards and such, is that I don't think my headshot really "sells" me. I don't think my resume really "sells" me.

I think I really sell me.

But I can't just think that, and expect people to somehow be magically drawn to me - I have to start actually making things happen.

And this is part of the process.

So again, if you've been reading along so far, and clicking on the ad (So I can make a little money for my efforts), I sincerely thank you.

Thanks for, in a nutshell, helping me help myself.

Going To The Movies

I worked at ArcLight Cinemas, a high-end movie theater here in L.A., for 2 1/2 years - from November 2005 till this past May. Which is a long time to hold that kind of job ("That's like ten years in a regular job...", I've joked).

One of the "perks" of working at a movie theater is that you get to see movies for free. And it's a perk I took great advantage of over my time there.

Those free movies, in part, were what kept me at ArcLight longer than I really wanted to be (That, and the whole thing about needing to pay for food and rent and what-have-you).

But when it comes down to it, you don't want your main form of out-of-the-house entertainment to be the same place where you work. I was fine with it for awhile, but sure enough, towards the end I was starting to feel "stuck" - I didn't want to go somewhere and pay for a movie (Heaven forbid!), but at the same time, the more unhappy I became about working at ArcLight, the more I didn't want to spend all my off-hours there.

Besides that, ArcLight Hollywood (Now there's an ArcLight Sherman Oaks as well) didn't get all the movies that were out at any given time, because of competition with nearby Graumans and El Capitan. Not to mention there were just movies that were not going to play at ArcLight (smaller, independent films, for example).

So ironically, I was working at a movie theater and seeing a lot of movies for free, but sometimes "missing out" on movies I wanted to see, and movies that, as an actor, I should have been seeing (I saw, maybe, ten movies outside of ArcLight during the time I worked there. I had to be very motivated to venture outside the "free movie zone" that had been established).

Now that I'm done with ArcLight, and I'm back to seeing movies on my own, I'm realizing just how much I've missed "going to the movies". I've missed having it be, for want of a better term, an event.

It's been a pleasure to go to whatever movie I want to see, when I want to see it (We could only see movies at ArcLight from Sunday night through Friday matinee, and not on holidays). And I've enjoyed "renewing my acquaintance" with venues like the Vista, the Sunset 5, the Laemmle Grand, and so on (With a theater like the Vista, I feel happy just being there, if that makes sense).

(The last movie I saw was Kabluey at the Regent on LaBrea, a theater I'd never been to; it was a fun movie, and a cool venue that I would never have discovered during "The ArcLight Era".)

And maybe more than anything, it's been nice to re-connect with the excitement and good feeling going to the movies gives me most times. Because that "excitement" is part of what made me want to be an actor in the first place.