Acting - Not Just My "Fantasy Career" Anymore

Yesterday's infomercial audition went well, I thought.

It was at Donna Rosenstein Casting, in Burbank, at 800 S. Main, an address housing the casting offices of Reaper (A favorite show), Brothers & Sisters, Samantha Who?, and Kyle XY.

I was early - I've never been there, and am not sure I've ever ridden my bike as far as Burbank, so I gave myself a lot of time - and got in a half-hour before my appointment.

I was reading the part of a "gas station manager", who's apparently none-too-happy to have John Cleese at my gas-station with his Book Of Inside Information (My lines were, "Get out of here! We don't want your kind! And take your book with you!").

A "helpful hint" to my fellow actors - It's kind of important, when memorizing lines for an audition, that you memorize your cues as well.

(You'd think I'd pretty much have that down by now, what with a lifetime of acting behind me - But at yesterday's audition, it wasn't until right before I was about to "do my thing" that I realized I didn't know my cue, and had to quickly glance down at my sides to get it; for the record, it was "...every time you fill up".)

The casting person (Kendra Castleberry, who I've seen at a workshop), had me do two takes, telling me to "go really broad" on the second one, and I left feeling like I did fine, and it was just going to depend on "What they're looking for".

As I've said before - in wistful tones - the days when I left an audition knowing I got the part...are long gone (One of a number of things I miss about my community theater days); now the best feeling I have leaving an audition is thinking, "I did my best...and now it's up to them".

I never "know" I booked the part, but with a good audition, I'll think, "Well, I certainly could book this...".

A fun note; Going in, I ran into an actor I knew coming out (I'd done a commercial with him years ago), and one of the first things he said was, "You've lost a lot of weight! You look great!".

That was nice.

_________________________
I've been thinking a lot about finances of late.

Mostly because they ain't so good right now.

One of the biggest challenges I've faced since moving to LA is trying to figure out "making a living" while pursuing an acting career.

For one thing , it's much more expensive living in LA than it was living in Lansing, MI (When I moved out here and started working at Borders, I was paying more for food and rent, while making less, than I was in Lansing. And I don't mind telling you - it was pretty scary).

You also have to figure out not just how you're going to make enough money to live, but when you're going to make it, while leaving enough time for auditions and/or classes, workshops, plays, etc.

My inability to completely figure this out is one of the reasons I haven't done theater in years - I felt like making theater a priority would mean having to work during the day, which would mean having to put my job in jeopardy every time I got called for an audition (Stress I frankly didn't think I could handle). And since I came out here to work in film and television, and had to make money in the meantime...theater's gotten put on a longer-term "back burner" than I would ever have imagined.

But one way or another, people figure things out, because you have to (Well, some people don't "figure things out"; they're the ones who go back to where they came from, in defeat).

I struggled through early on (Particularly when my savings quickly gave out), working a low-paying job, living on next to nothing, relying on the kindness of friends and well-wishers to help me out more than once, until I got a commercial agent, and eventually started supplementing my low-paying job with low-paying commercial work (This was pre-union).

Eventually, through commercial work, I got into SAG (Screen Actors Guild), and the gigs, when I got them, started paying better.

Then, through a fellow actor living in my building, I discovered the ACG (Actors Co-Op Group). And through casting workshops, eventually started getting auditions for tv (and, much less often, movies), booking my first co-star roles.

(ACG was also how I got my current manager - He used to run ACG before moving into management, signing ACG over to Molly, who'd been his assistant.)

And last year, for the first time, I made substantially more acting than I did through my "straight job" (First at Borders, then at ArcLight Cinemas). In fact, I made more money last year than I've ever made before ever.

It was, in a word, thrilling (To give you some perspective - we're not talking "rich person" money here. More like "lower middle-class" money).

I paid off my credit card bills, paid my car and health insurance premiums in lump-sum payments, and paid my friends some of what I owed them (But only some. And that was a long time ago now, which bothers me).

I went back to Michigan for a visit. I went to a harmonica "Jam Camp" in nearby Irvine. I signed up for a gym membership. I got cable and high-speed internet.

And after a friend bought me an initial ten-week membership, I started going to Weight Watchers (Where I will soon be working).

I don't think it was an extravagant life, but it was certainly a better lifestyle than I'd enjoyed...well, ever, really.

And it was brought to you courtesy of "acting".

That was last year.

Then the Writers strike happened.

Then a lengthy back-and-forth between SAG and the AMPTP happened (And is still happening).

And you've no doubt heard about the country careening towards another "Great Depression"...?

And in the middle of all this, I decided, due in part to my unhappiness over some shifts in policy, to quit my job at ArcLight Cinemas, and go "free-lance" as an actor.

(The primary goal in coming out here has always been "to support myself as an actor" and not work a regular job. But I could see where you might question my timing in "quitting my day job". After all, I've questioned it myself. But that's stuff for another entry.)

What's my point with all this?

The kind of low-paying crap job I've held all my life won't pay the bills out here (Not even at a "baseline" level, let alone supporting the "cable and high-speed" internet lifestyle I've so enjoyed the past year-and-a-half or so). And working at Weight Watchers, while it may be more personally satisfying than things I've done before - we'll see - is basically, money-wise, another "low-paying crap job".

At my age, and with Sleep Apnea to boot, I don't have the energy for multiple jobs (Working and trying to make an acting career happen are two jobs right there), and even if I did, when would I act?

And even if I were to say "Screw it! This acting thing isn't going to work out...", I'd still have the issue of trying to earn a living with no serious money-making skills, education, or interests, as I'm pushing fifty.

I guess what I'm saying is something I've been aware of for a couple years now - Acting is not just my "fantasy career" anymore; I really need it to work out.

I have to succeed, because I genuinely can't imagine what happens if don't.

But for now, right now, I just need acting to "chip in" on the bills - I don't need to live "the high life"...I just want to keep the life going I have right now.